Weekend Disaster

I need to get out of the mindset that a few allowances here and there will be ok...at least not now. It's one thing to splurge when you are at your goal weight, or even on your way there. But I'm barely out of the starting blocks and I sabotage myself. I just don't like having to deprive myself of what I want foodwise, I feel like I should be able to eat whatever I want. But do I want to be able to eat what I want, or lose 20 lbs? What's more important? I wish I knew. This weekend it was eating whatever I wanted. And now the guilt has set in.

There are a few good things that came from this weekend. John and I had a great dinner out, it was nice to be back at the Playwright again. We don't get to spend nearly enough time with just the two of us. And we get a night away this weekend...cousin Dee's wedding woohoo!

The other good thing was I re-joined the gym. I've been thinking about it for a while and finally did it. I have at least 4 friends who go to the same gym I used to go to and they go on a regular basis so I'm hoping we can set dates and I will get there. It feels so good to be back there and working out. I plan to go at least twice, hopefully 3 or 4 times a week. I'm starting sort of slow, I still haven't done a whole lot with the knee since getting out of physical therapy. I was able to walk a little over 1.5 miles yesterday, although going faster than 2.8 on the treadmill makes the knee start to hurt...so I'm not going super fast but at least I'm going. I figure building up slowly and eventually I'll be back up to a regular speed. The elliptical seems to be the best option. Virtually no pain at all and able to go a regular pace.

I also need to figure out how to get rid of this neck pain from sleeping. Ouch! Every morning I wake up with pain in my right neck/shoulder. Getting old.